Rethinking Foster Care

I turned on my computer to start my day’s work when a reminder popped up on my screen. Today marked the birthday of Alonzo, a child I had represented many years back when he was a nine-year old child in foster care. The reminder flooded my mind with so many memories – his sweet smile; his constant efforts to get fries at a local McDonald’s; his persistent negotiations to trade information about his life for candy. Although just a kid, he knew how to use his charm to win over adults.    But on this day, Alonzo was celebrating his entrance into the world from a very different place – the state penitentiary – where he has been for almost seven years, and where he will likely remain for the next four decades. When Alonzo was 18 years old, he and several friends set out to rob a schoolteacher. The robbery went awry, and they ended up killing him. In his mug shot, Alonzo’s charming smile was replaced with a menacing scowl. He no longer resembled the kid in my back seat headed t...

A few weeks ago on a phone call discussing how systems can support keeping kids safely with their families, a judge abruptly interjected, “I don’t like this focus on the rights of parents. We should always be focusing on the best interest of children at all times, before a kid is removed and once a court is involved!” In my years practicing child welfare law, I’ve heard this refrain many, many times. It makes my head hurt. The refrain pains me because we all know that the “best interest of the child” is not an objective standard. All of us disagree – all the time – about what we think is best for a child. What time should they go to bed? Should they co-sleep with us? How should they be disciplined? Should they be raised in a “free-range” parenting style? Or is helicoptering around them best? Gather a group of parents, chat for a few minutes, and you’ll quickly realize how much we disagree about what is good for children. This dynamic exists within the child welfare system as wel...

A Keychain, A Box of Chocolates, and A Certificate of Emancipation Ikea Lanham Emancipation Day. Also known as the worst day of my young adult life. Although I wasn’t prepared to actually leave foster care, I had anticipated this day ever since I entered, nine years earlier. In fact, months prior, I had actually started to pack up and attempted to make plans for the day. But those plans were useless when January 1, 2009 arrived. I still remember that cold, long day. I was scared and worrying the night before. I couldn’t sleep. I was the 21 year-old mom of an almost-2-year-old boy, wondering where we’d go and what would come next for us. No one had answers for us.   After our foster parent made us leave, I didn’t know where to go. I started scrolling through my phone’s call log with hopes of finding someone to call to give us a place to go, even for a few days. I couldn’t allow us to be set out like garbage awaiting the trash truck. Of all the ...

Hope A few days ago, I walked into a room full of young adults who had spent time in our foster care system, including some who had emancipated after many years. Entering a room full of folks who have experienced our foster care system personally is a familiar situation for me, and it’s one of the greatest privileges and joys of my job.   I meet and speak with as many young people and parents with lived experience as possible.   In fact, this group was the second group of young people I had meet with that day. In looking around the room, I realized that I knew nearly all of the young people in the room .   I mean I really knew them - Kayla, Joshua, Diego, David, Leroy, Scout, Lupe, Eric-lee and so many others.   I had met these people on multiple occasions. We had been in meetings together, attended the same events, and had lots of conversation.   I had heard their stories, been in photos together, and befriended many on social media (the only reason ...

A System In Need Of Umpires A few weeks ago, a retired judge shared with me how he’d reform juvenile court. He remarked, “I’d tell judges they shouldn’t be umpires. They need to do more than call balls and strikes. They need to go out there and help kids.” I get that sentiment. We all entered this field to help kids and their families. We all want to ease the suffering of those in pain. We all feel the urge to do more. But I disagree with him. Perhaps what our families need more than anything else are umpires, with juvenile court judges using the law as their strike zone. As a lawyer for children and parents over the last 18 years, I’ve been struck by how little the law factors in at everyday court hearings. Judges don’t demand citations to statutes. Attorneys don’t file motions. As a result, hearings don’t revolve around the governing legal standards. In fact, throughout my career, I’ve heard judges chide lawyers and parents when they emphasize the l...

A Song for Families   An episode of NPR’s all-songs-considered has been stuck in my head for the past week or so.   I listened to it on the drive back to DC from the holiday weekend.   The theme was anthems.   It was fascinating.   The hosts discussed the contexts in which the songs were written, how each came to be known, what they represented and why they warranted anthem status.   They explored how anthems can celebrate, commemorate, or question if America is living up to its ideals-- and how each type was inherently patriotic.   The Star Spangled Banner headlined, but the hosts soon turned to “This land is our land,”   “Blowing in the Wind”, “Born in the USA”, “Fight the Power” (both versions) and a couple others.   They unpacked the songs.   Some were controversial.   Some were misunderstood.   All are emblematic. Guthrie sang to the dangers of economic disparity. Springsteen called us to do better by veteran...

Recently I sat on a panel at a statewide conference on legal representation at which a judge made the following remark: “We need high quality parent representation in child welfare cases. What we don’t need are lawyers who act like public defenders.” Many in the audience nodded in agreement. This wasn’t the first time I’ve heard a judge make this type of remark, and honestly, I’m a little annoyed each time I do. Some of the very best lawyers I know are public defenders, and I know that the child welfare system would be a better place for families if they practiced in it. Think about a system in which lawyers cited laws and statutes, aggressively enforced removal standards, challenged reasonable efforts findings, and thoroughly cross-examined witnesses and introduced new evidence. Such zealous advocacy would undoubtedly improve decision-making in our system. But perhaps buried within the judge’s remark lies an important nugget that sets family defense lawy...